The Academy, Middle Abbey Street

You're not here for craft cocktails or small plates – you're here because the bass is rattling your ribcage and the crowd actually moves to the beat. This Abbey Street institution gets it right where so many Dublin clubs fumble: decent sound engineering, DJs who read the room, and punters who've come to dance rather than pose with bottles. The space itself won't win design awards, but when you're three drinks in and the lights are strobing, you couldn't care less about the décor. What matters is that the floor's packed with people who know good house from wedding DJ fodder, and the bar staff can actually hear your order over the music. It's proper clubbing without the Temple Bar tourist nonsense.